One of the many problems with living in a foreign country when you have dementia can be having to also readjust your mind with all the differences in customs, cultures, traditions, and the differences in language which can cause added stress to the condition.
Confusion ensues
Today my wife has been home, it’s her rest day
from our shop, I should say it’s nice to have her
bustling around me, but now the problems start,
She’s cleaning and tidying up the house, starting
to move things all around, now attacking at my table,
where I sit working, day in day out,
So I decided its best go outside, relax, and take in
some fresh air, but when I came back, to sit at my
table, what a nice surprise waiting for me, as nothing
could I find, yes it’s lovely to have you with me today
my darling, But,
Where are all my pencils and ball pens, and where are
my note pads for me to sit and write, where have all my
poems gone, and where are the dictionaries for my mind,
everything’s gone, it’s all out of my sight,
I know from within your eyes the table is now nice and
clear, But, Oh dear, Oh dear my love, you have so totally
confused me this day,
Now you’re sitting beside me talking, telling me all the
latest news, about a goat just born in our village, without
any legs but has two heads, that everyone is going to
look and see,
You’re getting so very excited, talking about this big event,
but the right words in English you can’t find, so now you’ve
switched to Indonesian, and then telling me the same thing
in Javanese,
No, stop, stop, stop not in three languages please, as my
head is spinning, going round and round, all the languages
mixing together inside my head, or has someone turned
on a blender in my brain,
Yes my wife it’s lovely you are by my side today, but
one thing is now very clear in my mind,
Confusion ensues all around.
Barry November 2006
Obsessions
Oh what’s happening within my life, as nothing around
seems to be right, my trousers are too tight, and then they’re
too loose, the belts are too wide, so they wont fit through the
loops, my shirts are the wrong colours, and why have they
got long sleeves, now my hats are all wrong, and why do
I need so many pairs of shoes,
The food tastes terrible no matter what I eat, yet my
taste buds are craving for delectable treats, the sun’s
scorching bright, yet why am I feeling so cold, so I’m
wearing two jumpers as to ward off the snow, I’ve
brushed my hair a dozen times, yet it’s still not as I like,
but should the parting be on the left or the right,
Now I must have those ball pens, but I don’t know why,
since no longer do I sit and write, then the clothes in my
wardrobe I really must change, as within my eyes they all
look the same, and I must buy those new trainers, in case
I go out jogging tonight, so I’d best have an umbrella,
just in case it rains,
The television’s now rubbish, no matter what I watch, so
should we think about buying a new TV, and when you
go shopping can you buy a new clock, as I’ve lost the sight
of time, now you want to sit talking telling me about your
day, yet I sit with tight lips, and a frown, as I’m scared my
words will be mumbled to confound,
Oh obsessions, obsessions, as now nothing is right today.
Barry August 2009
I do not have a clue
I want to scream, I want to shout out,
smash a dish, let all my feelings be felt,
and I do not have a clue as to why,
I went to write a most eloquent verse,
but the words in my mind won’t rhyme,
and I do not have a clue as to why,
I went to make a light Victoria sponge,
but the idea collapsed before I did start,
and I do not have a clue as to why,
I went to paint a pictorial floral scene,
but the landscape’s all sheaves of wheat,
and I do not have a clue as to why,
I went to play you a romantic melody,
but the notes on the piano sound the same,
and I do not have a clue as to why,
I went to type a letter on the computer,
but the keys all merged appearing absurd,
and I do not have a clue as to why,
I went to cut you the most fragrant bouquet,
but the flowers had no blooms or scent,
and I do not have a clue as to why,
I want to scream, I want to shout out,
smash a dish, but Oh dear, I’m still in bed,
maybe this is the clue to all the why’s.
Barry September 09